I recently saw the video of Otto Frank, Anne Frank’s father.
One of the things he says in this video quite touched me. He says that, “Anne and I were very close and used to talk about everything under the sun. However, when I read her diaries, I discovered a very different Anne than the one I knew as my daughter. I didn’t ever know this side of her which was so serious and had such deep thoughts and feelings.“
Otto Frank claims in the same video that most people don’t really know their children.
That’s not me though, I thought. Perhaps, you think the same.
OK. What if the question was “How well do I know my kids?”
“Very well.”
“..better than I know my own self!”
I am sure many parents will be tempted to say something similar to one of the options from the list above. I know because I had felt the same way. Until.. yesterday.
YESTERDAY
I had my own perception of how Tanav would rank his closest play friends, in order of his preference or likeness. It was based on my own assessment of them and what I had heard from conversations with Tanav.
My challenge was to see how close my ranking was to Tanav’s ranking of them!
I asked him who he would rank first, second and so on and why. Below are the findings:
(♥names changed to protect myself from being killed by their parents♥)
(♥although I have an decryption algorithm to get to their real names even 30 years from now .. Hasta la vista, baby 🙂 ♥)
#1 Mishika– She brings snacks and always shares with me.
#2 Sharad– He is also my mate at the handwriting classes. The more I know him, the more I like him.
#3 Aryan – He is straight forward.
#4 Nancy – She smells badly!
#5 Tanvi – She cheats!
..Well, my assessment couldn’t have been more wrong! Here’s what I had thought about Tanav’s preference:
#1 Nancy – She is nice, helpful and docile. (Well. but the sweat! How about we gift you a deodorant on your birthday?)
#2 Tanvi – She is very sharp and bright kid. (You don’t need to cheat kiddo, and if you do, at least don’t get caught!)
#3 Mishika – Nice but clever and nagging. (Ok, you are the sharing kinds too. Kudos!)
#4 Sharad – He is little and doesn’t get it! (..but you’re always there!)
#5 Aryan – He is a bully! (and one who doesn’t mince words!)
I recalled in the evening that Tanav had forgotten to rank Jannat.
Jannat, the cute little girl who he plays with and is very fond of. Once Dad had brought a puppy home, and I saw Tanav daydreaming about Jannat, “If Jannat likes Sohana (Tanav’s little sister) so much, I wonder how much would she like this puppy!”
I asked him later at night, “Hey Tanav, you forgot to rank Jannat?”
“Papa, move Mishika down from where she was before, and replace her with Jannat.”, was his instant reply.
I was amazed with his promptness and couldn’t help recall the endless hours we usually spend in ranking our work subordinates during the annual performance appraisals.
I asked, “Why is Jannat at #1 Tanav?”
He moved away from TV and stepped closer to me, “..because she is very this” he said as he pulled my left cheek with his right hand.
I get it, buddy! At least, we are on the same page on this.
Well. Now, it’s your turn to take the challenge. Wish you good luck! Please do share your findings and comments below.
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