Five Minute Journal – Why You Must Wear The Same Thing Everyday!


Finding of the day: According to Fast Company, Barack Obama, when he was the President, always wore the same thing – a blue or black suit. This was part of his secret to getting so much done.

He wanted to leave his mind saved from Decision Fatigue, which happens when you use your mind for trivial decisions such as what to eat, wear, buy… This let him focus effectively when the time came for more important decisions to be made.


(START OF THE DAY)

I am grateful for…

  1. being able to witness my little ones growing up into individuals who are self-understanding. That may sound different from what the world seeks for their children- intelligent, smart, confident, good, but that is enough for me! More than enough actually. Loved watching my five year old daughter practicing for her first ever Fashion show at school the coming weekend. Love your cat walk sweets!
  2. the open conversations without any mincing of the words with my better half. Love these. While there is still a long way to go but I am pausing to thank God for the long journey we have covered to get to where we have reached today.
  3. Zen Parenting folks for everything they do. Their tagline to start with which goes, “the best predictor of a child’s well being is a parent’s self understanding!” Some other quotes that convey a similar message which I recollect:

“Your children will not do what you say. They will say what you do!”

A sign of great parenting is not how your children behave. A sign of great pareting is how you behave!”

What would make today great?

  1. I have done everything possible to minimize the morning decision fatigue – While I am not a Presidential candidate and I don’t completely subscribe to Obama way of wearing the same suit daily but still I have exactly decided the night before, what I will wear to work the next day, taken a shower at night to avoid the procrastication or laziness that starts coming in the wintry mornings. Okay, all I am trying to say here is that after having done so much, I would be happy if I reach work by 9:30 AM.
  2. Taking final steps in getting ready with the pack for the BIG meeting that’s tomorrow. Eating an elephant can only be done one way: one bite at a time, and these are my final bites.
  3. Sharing an anecdote with kids before they leave for school. What started as morning prayer is taking new shapes and forms and serving the curious little minds with some food for thought is extremely satisfying.
Daily affirmations. I am …. yes, just that, “I am!”, and that’s about acceptance, iss-ness and being. I am and that’s a short and yet the most powerful affirmations eva!
 
Amazing things that happened today…
  1. Ate Burritos for lunch at the new outlet with Deepti, my better half. That was something different and removed the last stains of the guilt I was carrying from yesterday (of completely forgetting about Deepti and having lunch alone unaware!).
  2. Used the two hours drive in productive and open hearted conversation with Deepti. This time which would have been spent in complaining about the traffic or half asleep, was well spent. Interested in what our deep dive was about? Well, the question was: Can a young man and a young woman be friends in a purely platonic relationship? (remember: the movie Maine Pyaar Kiya’s dialogue). While we might consider ourselves progressive and immediately answer ‘yes’ but we’re probably still conditioned in our minds differently… where to draw the line, and how does the society we live in see it? Will share more about that and what we concluded another time.
  3. I think I guarded my time much better today. Didn’t get swayed by someone pushing me into something I would not do. Using my time intentionally and not letting people barge into the little margins reserved for family is truly amazing. #ProudOfMyself
(BEFORE HITTING THE BED)
How could I have made today better?
  1. Haven’t been able to find a time for daily exercise. Miss it a lot, and before this important not urgent stuff becomes urgent, it’s time I schedule it in the calendar – As they say, what gets scheduled gets done!
  2. I think I need to have a better handle over the overall plan. The handoff edges are not smooth and agreeing to go forward with half-baked information is becoming a norm. I guess “THE BUCK STOPS HERE” approach is what might work best in this scenario. For that, surely what is needed is complete clarity and control – not leaving a thing up in the air.

Five Minute Journal: Do You Know What Makes CEOs Successful?


Finding of the day:

According to storybrand.com, a surney of 72 CEOs of successful companies that were doing $50 million and up in revenue revealed the key predictor to their success, and it’s surprising. Read on..

That characteristic is self-awareness, which is defined as “the capacity to monitor and self-regulate one’s internal world.


(START OF THE DAY)

I am grateful for…

  1. WordPress developers who have created Content Templates. Content templates load the template which is really helpful to writers belonging to all categories – from novices to start their 5-Minute Journal (like this one is a Content Template. It loads to format itself!) to bloggers to get over the writer’s block.
  2. being in a position that I can give. Remember what my friend Karan Manveer says, “Giving hurts but so does taking, so might as well give. Living hurts but so does dying, might as well live!” #Joyofgiving clothes to the needy for the winter that’s approaching.
  3. the Weekly Design System that Robin Sharma shared, and I have been using this since over 5 years. It let’s you create such a massive focus and contiuity into your life and builds a momentum that’s a force to reckon with. Try it out and it may just change your life. Also, glad I created an excel version of it. (Happy to share with those who ask.)

What would make today great?

  1. Slightly different take today on this question. Today would be great if I remain hydrated (4L), and tranquil (calm) while performing my tasks.
  2. Remaining hydrated enhances creativity and that would let me create a BIW( Oh, I mean Best in World) deliverable!
  3. If I went to the gym and release as much Endorphins, a hormone that helps the body cope with the pain and muscle tear that happens during exercising. Endorphins also trigger a positive feeling in the body, shh…similar to that of morphine.
Daily affirmations. I am …seeing my dreams manifest into reality before my eyes.
 
Amazing things that happened today…
  1. Surprisingly, the traffic on the roads wasn’t as usual. What normally takes me an hour and 45 minutes was covered in little over an hour. Thank God for small mercies. Has everybody left for Christmas / New Year Holiday leaving me to work? Well, for now, let’s just celebrate the improved traffic condition.
  2. Some bitter medicines yield good results. I am glad I pushed myself into talking to someone in the higher ups who I knew would be genuinely helpful. It required me to step out of my comfort zone. #CourageOverComfort
  3. Someone I know has been out of sorts and anxious. Today, she said that she has figured what would make her really really happy today and every day! I am glad she realized it after all. Okay, you also want to know – answer is kind of boring but that is so true. She thinks that a “daily exercise” in some form will do it for her. Well, I am sure it would, to her, me and everyone who wants to be happier. Don’t believe me? Well, try it. 
(BEFORE HITTING THE BED)
How could I have made today better?
  1. I missed an opportunity to have lunch with Dinky, my wife. What a shame I forgot about the fact that she was at work today in the same building. I am glad Deepti’s didn’t create too fuss of it though. But more than anything else, it tells me that my mind has a tendency to be hijacked amidst the office noise. I have to get over that and stay present. Mindfulness.. here I come!
  2. Jonathan Fields says in the Good Life Project, that there are three buckets that need constant filling to make a happy fulfilled day. These are like buckets with little holes at the bottom. Leaving any bucket empty is not a good idea as it would drag the other buckets down with it. These buckets are- Connection, Contribution and Vitality. While I did well on Connection and even Vitality today, Contribution took a bit of a back seat.
  3. Didn’t spend enough quality time with kids. Could have made it more with an activity which would encourae fun, collaborative, and engaging.

Journaling For The Busy You – The Five Minute Journal!

Making this new beginning today. Taking the 5 Minute Journal from ‘offline’ mode to online. For more details on the concept, check this link.


Quote of the day: Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one’s courage.


(START OF THE DAY)

I am grateful for…

  1. being blessed with so many resourceful and enouraging people around. It makes seemingly uphill tasks a relatively easy and enjoyable journey.
  2. having the courage to use my ability to make life’s important decisions intentionally.
  3. the reunion and connect with old MBA school pals who are all in similar season of life. It’s such a mastermind group!

What would make today great?

  1. Having a clear and realistic plan and set the right expectations.
  2. Resuming the nature walk. 30 minutes today.
  3. Making specific decisions and progress. Collaborate, gather inputs but most importantly, don’t shy away from making decision making.
Daily affirmations. I am … being supported by the universe on my efforts!
 
(BEFORE HITTING THE BED)
Amazing things that happened today…
  1. The newly constructed and now operational flyover was a pleasant surprise. What used to take us a few hours took us less than 15 minutes. Thank God for little mercies.
  2. Amidst the challenges of life, handling people’s emotional outbursts and getting pushed and thrown around, the delicious home made Kadhi Chawal came as welcome break.
  3. Kids called us all into the living room for their dance performance. It lasted for a few minutes, but children’s giggles, smiles and carefree dancing, was almost shouting back at me that the simple pleasures in life are worth more than any millions. 
How could I have made today better?
  1. Worrying unneccesarily wasn’t a good idea. Obviously. It gave me nothing except doubts and anxiety. Could have tackled the feeling when it came, took some action(s), and moved on with rest ofthe day’s agenda. That would have made today better.
  2. They say that “what you schedule gets done!“. While that did happen eventually, but I could have been more intentional and created the schedule in the first hour of waking up.
  3. Could have spent some more time with the kids today. It’s a shame that although I was home, all I did was sharing with them about “The great indian rope challenge”, about which Ruskin Bond had written an interesting article. There’s room.

When You Answer Life’s Important Questions..

I am so excited to be on Editor’s page of The Scoop, our Toastmasters club’s magazine. After all, this has been a long and somewhat lost dream. This is certainly BIG for me to be the editor!

In the editor’s note, I share what sowed the seeds of becoming an editor in my mind long back. Sometimes, we get clues about what we want to do in the most unusual places and unexpected times. If you are still looking for what you are meant to do,  pay attention to these times. Because teacher appears when the student least expects it.

Read on for full story…


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Do What You Say!

Say what you do.

Do what you say.

A harmonious life

isn’t too far away.

 

“Don’t play on the phone.

Don’t shout, don’t fight!”,

said I, while talking on the phone.

And was I polite?

 

Kids are either on the tab

or fighting or crying..

Boss is bad, ..no one understands.

…every moment, I’m dying!

 

Either they’re all insane,

or may be..,

just may be,

I’m doing something ‘not right’?

 

I thought all day,

..even sat to pray.

When I slept,

“He” showed me the way,

 

“Say what you do

Do what you say

A harmonious life

isn’t too far away.”

 

All this while,

I was looking outside.

Practicing this mantra,

brought ‘peace’ to my life.

 

Just say what you do

Do what you say

A harmonious life

really isn’t too far away!


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Are You A Clock Builder Or A Time Teller?

“There is so much going on – I am struggling to do what is expected of me- at home, at work. I am missing my tasks, and getting occasional brickbats. All this is leading to resentfulness, followed by regret and then guilt. I am so stressed! Is there a way out?”

The year was 2004, and I was just beginning my career.

I was almost at the bottom of the pyramid back then, and yet I felt the pain. However, I would see people in the middle management who would never miss a single task that requires attention.

Raja, Priyanka and I were cab mates. They were both much senior to me – both Senior Managers, and I was a team member. I would notice Raja using his paper notebook all the time – capturing the bullet points of the tasks, the risks, the issues. It was organized such that he could look at the previous day’s progress and cross out the ones which were completed, and carry forward the ones that didn’t.

I initially felt it was so uncool.

His notebook filled like a bucket does with the tap open, …really fast. He made sure he updated it for the day even before we reached office, and in office, he would be fully prepared with almost everything. He was effective in meetings and knew exactly what needed to be done today versus what could wait for tomorrow.

Priyanka would use her laptop for similar purpose but she too always was on top of things. They were both extremely well prepared before reaching the office.

On the other hand, I was usually asleep along the nearly 2 hour long journey to work. I would start thinking of work only after I reached office most of the time. That resulted in following:
-I didn’t have an agenda when I reached office. Since I didn’t have one of my own, I had no choice but to follow other’s agendas. 
-I was constantly struggling – challenged to complete the tasks in time, missing out on tasks, doing certain things awfully wrongly.

Overall, I was reactive, waiting for instructions and of course was not being effective and not happy. But I didn’t know what was going wrong.

I was being a time teller rather than being a clock builder

I asked Priyanka once, “You are working on multiple projects and yet you are always on top of everything. What tools do you use to manage?”

She told me about systems. Systems to take care of everything to manage. 

That system could be a notepad like in case of Raja or an excel list in case of Priyanka. Those are simply tools which help one in doing the work effectively.

While they were going with systems, I was going where ever the wind was taking me. Obviously they were happy driving things and had a greater chance of getting to where they planned to go. I on the other hand, didn’t even where I wanted to go.

I was lacking a system for my life, and that what was making it a painful journey for me. I didn’t know what tools I could use to have a ‘system‘ that worked for me.

Don’t use too many:
I tried various different tools, got very fond of some too. However, I realized over time that one should use a minimum number of tools that are required. Too many tools will only add to the misery. These tools are there to help in accomplishing the work at hand, and not to become confusing work themselves.

Don’t get too hung up on the tool itself:
Tools are a means to an end – not an end in itself. So, spending time playing around with it would be counter productive. Of course, you require the basic training to understand it, but sometimes we are tempted to go on an endless exploration when we are supposed to do the work. That is a Big NO!

Choice of Tool doesn’t matter so much:
Use tools to get the work done, as a medium and you will prosper. A single sheet of paper designed used consistently could work just as well.

While it’s okay to use these tools on a need basis throughout the day, it is important to use the ones what help plan the day, before you start your work day. It doesn’t take up a whole lot of your time once one gets the hang of it – it will take 15 minutes or less.

But those 15 minutes of planning the day would help you get on the driver’s seat for taking you to where you want to reach at the end of the day.

Now that you probably understand the importance of systems and tools in your professional (and even personal) life, here are the two that work best for me:

  1. Kanbanflow: This helps me organize my tasks based on my life priorities. It also has an in-built timer based on Pomodoro technique to complete the tasks. I use the FREE version which itself is extremely powerful. https://kanbanflow.com
  2. Trello: Another very powerful tool on similar lines is called Trello. It provides an ability to add attachments to the tasks and also allows a simple way to create tasks automatically by sending out an email to a Trello email address. www.trello.com

Our career is a Marathon… a long journey! What is required is to build systems (clocks) and not be naive by being time tellers each time. It would be too many times that we will be asked and it will burn us down before the finish line if we don’t create systems. 

What Systems are you using for productivity and effectiveness in your life? 


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My Biased Opinion of My Son’s First Ever Public Speech!

“The next speaker is Tanav Sawhney.“, said Shreya, the Gavelier of the Day.

Tanav, my 9 year old son, emerged from the chair, walked in a confident gait, wearing his hat, and took the place to start the show. 

He noticed that the Gavelier had not invited him on the stage with the formal title and speaker name format. It was supposed to go in this case like, “The King of Pop, Tanav Sawhney. Tanav Sawhney, The King of Pop

But that didn’t deter him. In fact, he said it himself and proceeded with his speech: “The King of Pop, Tanav Sawhney. Tanav Sawhney, The King of Pop”

He was loud and clear.

He started by asking the audience, “Do you know who is the King of Pop?

(Technique 1) Surprisingly not many people knew that, but isn’t that such a great technique to start the speech – by starting with a question to get the audience’s brain to start exercising. It brings such a great engagement from them.

Tanav remembered all the techniques I had told him at different points when he was preparing the speech.

(Technique 2) First ten seconds in the speech are the key – the audience will decide if they want to stay with you or leave you, in those ten seconds.

Tanav had been able to grab the attention in those ten seconds. There was so much he did in that time – seemed such a natural progression.

There was pin drop silence when he was speaking. The audience was all ears. They had decided to stay with him. His question was followed by him saying, “For the next 2 minutes, I am Michael Jackson!”

Bold statement. Requires a lot of confidence to say that you will step into the shoes of the King of Pop.

(Technique 3) Entertain the audience.

Right after that claim, Tanav did a spin around but acted like he fell. That might have disappointment the audience a bit because they had made up their minds to see something great.

But it was part of the plan to fall, only to get up. “Let me try again.“, he announced as he wore his hat.

This time around, he was able to spin around, jump up and land on his toes. He remained in that pose for a few seconds.

Audience was all cheers.

(Technique 4) Educate the audience

Information and value bombs dropped all through Tanav’s 3 minutes and 10 seconds speech.

Tanav continued with sharing more information about Michael, his full name, his love for pets and his rather unusual pets – a chimpanzee, and a python, him being the first black artist to come on MTV, the Queen of Pop, his love for humanity, his most selling albums and so on.

There was bags full of information for the audience to go back.

(Tehcnique 5) Tantalize the audience.

While there was so much shared in Tanav’s speech, there was so much more for audience to go back and research on their own. Tanav’s speech was like a trailer for the audience’s mind to be at work even after the session has ended.

I can say with certainly that a few will definitely look up on Youtube and Google and learn and enjoy Michael’s songs.

And Tanav did complete justice to the trailer – He sang as he had mentioned about the most selling albums and even danced, showing his own love for the greatness of Michael and inspiring the audience to find out more.

(Technique 6) Play the part with all you’ve got and enjoy.

You learn best in moments of enjoyment.

Tanav sprinkled humor in his speech throughout. Like when he asked, “Do you know what is MJ’s python’s name?”

Then added, “It’s Madonna, the Queen of Pop!”

Hilarious.

The way to entertain the audience is to enjoy the speech yourself. Tanav was thoroughly enjoying the act such as when he acted like MJ’s chimpanzee and python, when he danced and on it goes.

His use of props – the MJ Hat, the black armband and even the choice of his dress showed that he is here to perform. Just like Him.

His moving from one place to the next when he shared MJ’s three most selling albums was very impressive – very experienced speakers forget that so often. He used the stage with such perfection when he pointed to three different places while mentioning, the people who are dying, the children in pain and people living in poverty.

Hat’s off!

(Technique 7) Give them something original. Something novel.

Tanav said, “His full name was Michael Joseph Jackson.” and then he added, “He is called MJ in short form, but I think he should be called MJJ..

The way Tanav emerged out of Michael’s body, and said, “I was trapped inside Michael for so long.”


With all the above going on in a ~3 minutes speech, it’s easy to forget the overall message the speaker wants to convey.

(Technique 8) There must be a single clear overall message for the audience.

As Tanav emerged out of Michael’s body, he said, “I am Tanav. I also want to help the people who are dying, the children in pain and the those living in poverty”

Then he urged the audience, “You also please help them, and be like Him and me.

I write Him in capitals because I feel the way Tanav said it, there was a double meaning in that, he meant not only Michael but also God Almighty himself. Tanav had pointed up above as he had said “Him”.

Something even he may not be able to understand himself also being a nine year old, but he will realize it as he grows.

(Technique 9) The last ten seconds are the final key

Tanav was at peace as he said “..be like Him and me.” His eyes slowly closing peacefully, and his arms and head stretching upwards and then back.

He remained in that pose for a few seconds before he said, “Thanks.

That made every soul in the audience believe in Tanav’s message.

He received the audience’s standing applause with such grace and then moved out of the stage with a moonwalk.

Video is attached. Please write your unbiased opinion in the comments below.


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Are You Thinking What You Mustn’t?

GABBAR IS BACK!


Dad’s cough hasn’t been going away. Talk about persistence. But she’s trespassed a wrong place. I know Dad since when I was a child. He has kicked several nasty trespassing beasts like you. That’s Dad for you.

Remember Gabbar says in Sholay, “Ab ayega majaa! Bahut din ke baad Gabbar ko koi mila hai jo itani baat kar sakey!

Gabbar has been through several tests by now LFT, TFT, Chest X-Ray. But he’s gearing up. He’s been through a short denial phase and now ready to take the bull by it’s horn. He has accepted it and looking for the way forward.

CHOOTA GABBAR:


But truth be told,  its indeed a bit worrying. I have been very emotional last few days. In fact, I did a sketch of Dad and I, of a time when I was a baby.

Does worrying help?- No, I know! In fact, it makes it worse.

Dad has lived a life where he either takes action or forgets about it. Worrying distracts and kills. And kills not once, it kills over and over and over. So, its worse than death.

Like one of my friends (Hi Ankit!) says: If something is bothering you, either you can do something about it or not. If you can do something, do it. If you can’t: Forget it. In any case DO NOT WORRY!

The more I think of not worrying the more I worry. What will get to to get back in control. God!

THE TIPPING POINT


Amidst all this chaos in my mind, I get a Whatsapp message from my Toastmaster’s club:

Greetings from the newsletter team. The wait is over. The work done. We are finally here after months of patience and hard work, with the third edition of our newsletter, ‘The Scoop’.

We welcome you all with smiles, to witness something close to our hearts. Something we are proud of. Something which couldn’t have been possible without any of you.

When? March 04, 2018.
Where? The usual. Mahaan.

We promise to bring smiles on the faces of each and every one present. We promise it is going to be one hell of an experience.

Let the excitement begin!

With much love, 
Ishani Luthra, Editor, Newsletter Team
Toastmasters Club of West Delhi

This message excited me. After all, this time around, I have contributed to the newsletter. My poem – Will I Die Undone.

Suddenly, I see hope. I see that the world is after all a happy and fair place. People are working to a better tomorrow, the newsletter team, for example! And that I am also doing my bit, even if it is a little bit. And, its these many littles that makes a BIG difference.

Just a while ago, I felt no energy to get out of the house and face the world. A ‘moment’ can change that. I am ready to take on the challenge=opportunity. Done that in the past.

To begin with, I am getting ready to attend the TMWD meeting. TMWD Family. There’s a reason it’s called a ‘family’. Family is where you are accepted the way you are. It’s brings you hope. It encourages you.

And the poem, the little investment I had made a few months back. That has borne its first fruit. It’s more than my poem being published in a newsletter (although since it’ll be my first, I haven’t felt so elated eva’!). It’s the momentum that it has built. It’s the feeling that I have control over my life, and this world. I can even make a dent in this universe.

I walked up to Gabbar and told him, “We’re in it together. We’ll get past this!” With a conviction that I seem to be losing for last few days.

Gabbar returned a smile that said, I’m UP FOR IT!

He’s Crazy Like a Fool..

Its funny how things change over time. What I would have considered embarrassing until a few years ago, is exactly what I am proud of about Dad today!

See the picture. It tells so much about Dad which is hard for me to express as well in words.  

There was this one plastic chair which broke – broken leg. A Leg which completely came off. It was to any ordinary human being as if it is done and over with. But not for Dad. He’s made the impossible possible. Look at the picture and you can validate that for me.

He is one person who finds joy in doing things, in achieving results. He spent so much time in fixing the chair. Not that he doesn’t have the money or that he can’t buy a new one or he can’t throw the broken one. He’s always up to something with no time to waste or feel low.

It’s just that he is so full of life and energy and he is so much about making things right and finding possibility where anybody and for me it would have been impossible for me to even think of doing something like thing and I’m sure for most of you as well.

Now, you can laugh at it, or we can make fun. You can say that it is cheap or ridiculous or just a jugaad as we call it. But it tells a lot more about the man who’s done it. About the possibilities that exist even when we think that it’s all over.

Now close your eyes just for five seconds and recall one thing about your Mom and Dad that do which seems crazy or eccentric or insane or embarrassing? Chances are it will bring a smile to you and if not now, then in time, that very thing about them is what you might be proud of.

[bctt tweet=”“If you think anyone is sane you just don’t know enough about them.”  ― Christopher Moore” username=”mohitsawhney”]

Here’s wishing you happiness in achieving results. Here’s wishing you innovative ideas to problems which seem impossible. Here’s wishing you the courage to walk up to your Dad or Mom and plant them a kiss... and do that, regardless of perhaps because of how crazy you think they are! 

Signing off..